How young is too young to get married? To put it another way, what is your ideal age to get married and why?I generally don't believe that anyone is ever at the ideal age for marriage. We should always be open to growth, change, learning and heading off in different directions. Having someone you that you have a contract with limits those changes or, if you follow the statistics, leads to divorce. So what is the point of the marriage in the first place?
Life is a journey and while we may have a mate that walks some of that journey with us, the chances of finding someone who will still want to walk by your side once you extend your wings, or whether we want to walk with that same person as they grow and develop is unlikely. Unless of course someone begins to subvert their own needs, views and possibilities.
If I had to pick an age, I would say over 40, once life and our personalities have stabilized a bit but I do acknowledge that the 'children factor' then comes into play big time - making a Brady Bunch family isn't all it's been cracked up to be.
Maybe over 70 would be a better option ...
6 comments:
I like your Love answers - They always make me think.
I never thought I would get married until I met my husband, lol. I do agree that we are constantly growing and changing as people, and I think that it is quite natural for people to grow in different directions over the years. In this respect I think the ideas of "marriage" and "life partners" leave a lot to be desired.
I also think that while marriage is a very old tradition, we are now a "newer species" and we have possibly out grown the concept. Our life expectancy is far greater today than it was when people first started marrying. For a young couple, "till death do us part" used to mean 10 years, tops. Now we are living so much longer - it is no wonder people are getting sick of each other, really.
Oh thank you for your answer - I feel so bad sometimes writing my answer to these questions because I am just not romantic, I don't believe in the things that "everyone else" does (marriage. monogamy, till death do us part) and I don't really want to change. I feel very out of place sometimes ...
Not that I am putting myself down, nor am I recovering from a bad experience/s - that is just who I am. It is just that some people get so offended when I open my mouth - and that is the last thing I ever want to do. Sigh ... now I am getting melodramatic lol
Thanks again :-)
Mmmm, I think you can change and grow with a partner, without limmits if both recognise each is changing...
someone said to me (cynic that he is) that the first marriage is for children, the second would be for him....
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my aunt got married at 70+ and the wowsers of the family were shocked...I thought it was romantic
Wow, what a can of worms you've opened...
I don't think there is a "set age" that's right for everyone, because we all mature at different ages, points in our lives. I know a couple that married at age 14 & lived happily married for over 40 years 'til he passed away. But then I also know of people that don't marry 'til in their 30's or 40's & then have short-lived marriages. Some marry over & over, making the same "mistake" each time. Some people are simply not marriage-material. I was engaged at 19, married at 20 (my husband 28), and I like to think we'll be together 'til death do us part... & I'm still waiting for him to finish maturing. ;)
I must admit the Love Q meme does get us thinking - there are so many people in this world is it impossible to genralise for all but it is great to get the range of opinions :-)
OK, that is what I'm actually hoping to see with the Love Q. Throw out a question and read the range of opinions and debates. And I'm having such fun with Abbey's answers and yours, two contrasting opinions and outlook sometimes. :)
Anyway, personally, I think 20 to 30 is about the "right" age in general. Not too young that we are still unsure what we want in life and not too old that we are too set in our ways or to start a family. Having said that, it is really hard to find an ideal age in reality, though.
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