Saturday, April 24, 2010

Do You Remember?

A wonderful friend of mine, an older lady, is losing her memory - and it worries her.

She doesn't want to worry people but she confides in me because we see each other so often. Maybe she has confided in others too, but I don't know.

I certainly don't mind helping out, explaining bit and pieces, co-ordinating with agencies and the like for her. I don't feel obliged in any way, I am just happy to help out.

What does concern me is whether she has told others. Her family is overseas but she does have some friends locally. She is a bit frail and wobbly on her feet but that is manageable. Her memory is another thing - she needs additional support with finances and other sensitive issues. At some point soon (ish) she may need either someone to live in with her, or to move somewhere where she has that other additional support - where she will be safe. I don't know if she has any plans made in that regard.

We had a chat the other day about whether she should keep her car or not (coming from a financial perspective). I wondered if there would come a specific day when, because of her memory, she shouldn't drive or whether there would just be a grey area of "maybe" until something happens to make the decision. And if one is losing their memory, are they in a position to cognitively recognize that it may not be safe?

I am more than happy to help but I don't want to pry or intrude into private matters. Do I contact one of her local friends and discuss the matter with them? Should her family be told?

Hmmmm ....

Photo: "Remember" by ZanaSoul

1 comment:

pita-woman said...

I think definitely someone in her family should be talked to and allowed to make those decisions.
But you're a good friend for doing what you can to help her out.